"If you can spot it, you've got it."
This phrase emerged from the idea that what irritates or disturbs us the most about other people is often a reflection of ourselves.
When another person pisses you off, how often do you stop and consider exactly what it is about them that bothers you?
You might say "it's because he/she is annoying/arrogant/obnoxious" but what would you discover about yourself if you dug a little deeper and asked "why does this bother me?"
In this episode of the ikario podcast, Shane and I dive deep into the topic of psychological projection and share our own experiences with this unusual quirk of the human mind.
And as always, we attempt to provide practical takeaways, specifically for spotting your own psychological projections and emotional triggers.
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In this episode...
Some of the points covered in today's conversation:
- Why we often fail to see the flaws in our own character whilst exaggerating those of other people.
- "Why do some insults hurt and others don't?" (an example of psychological projection)
- How Ollie resolved inner conflicts with others by using shadow work.
- Why awareness may be the most powerful aspect to positive change.
- How to build compassion and tolerance for those who we think are different to us - and why this is a challenge.
- A brief introduction to shadow work.
- Ollie's tips for handling emotional triggers from other people - and why this is essential for having great relationships.
Links & Resources
- The Power Of Negative Emotions - Todd Kashdan, Robert Biswas-Diener
- Shadow Work: How I Learned to Get Along With Everyone During COVID-19 (Video)